Guides

While making art in active addiction, I bemoaned an inconsistent sense of self. Since entering recovery from addiction and depression, I’ve acknowledged my proclivity for reinvention as ingrained and informed by my interrelation with capitalistic modes of individuation and by the ego-negation of recovery practices. Being subject to the isolation of the COVID lockdowns changed my life, my brain, and my view of the world and its exigencies. I entered recovery during the pandemic, a time when you had to recover alone. Beset with severe isolation, I experimented in mental coalescence with entities of speculative, theoretical, and metaphysical agency (ESTHMA). Addiction is characterized by the need to control processes and outcomes, even when control is impossible. I practice art as therapeutic survival methods and aestheticizations of psychic survival processes. I apply chance-based techniques in my work to collaboratively share control with ESTHMA.